School Not Helping? What You Can Do

You've asked the school for help. Maybe more than once. You've had meetings. You've been told things would change. But your child is still struggling, still coming home distressed, and the support that was promised hasn't appeared.

It's exhausting. And the hardest part is not knowing whether you're expecting too much or too little.

You're not expecting too much. Schools have clear legal duties to support children with SEN. If they're not meeting those duties, there are steps you can take, and they start with a conversation, not a fight.

Start with the SENCO

Before going formal, make sure you've spoken directly to the school's Special Educational Needs Coordinator (SENCO). Sometimes class teachers agree to support that doesn't reach the SENCO, or the SENCO has put plans in place that haven't filtered down to the classroom.

Request a meeting with the SENCO and be specific about what's not working:

• "The support plan says my child should have 15 minutes of reading intervention daily. The teacher says this hasn't been happening."
• "My child was supposed to be moved to a seat at the front. They're still at the back."
• "The emotional regulation strategy we agreed on isn't being used when my child becomes distressed."

Specific examples are harder to dismiss than general concerns. Bring dates and details.

If the SENCO isn't responsive

If the SENCO doesn't respond, doesn't follow through, or dismisses your concerns, escalate to the headteacher. Write a letter or email that sets out:

1. What your child's needs are
2. What support has been agreed or should be in place
3. What's actually happening (or not happening)
4. What you're asking for

Reference the SEND Code of Practice and the school's legal duty under Part 3 of the Children and Families Act 2014. This signals that you know your rights without being confrontational.

Make a formal complaint

If informal approaches haven't worked, every school has a formal complaints procedure. You can usually find it on the school's website.

For academies and free schools, the complaints process is slightly different. If the school's own procedure doesn't resolve it, you can complain to the Education and Skills Funding Agency (ESFA).

When disability discrimination applies

If your child has a disability (which includes many SEND conditions), the Equality Act 2010 applies to schools. Schools must not discriminate against disabled pupils, and they have a duty to make reasonable adjustments.

Disability discrimination in schools can take several forms:

Direct discrimination - treating your child less favourably because of their disability. For example, excluding them from a school trip because of their condition.

Indirect discrimination - applying a rule that affects disabled children disproportionately. For example, a behaviour policy that punishes all children equally for behaviour that's a manifestation of a disability.

Failure to make reasonable adjustments - not changing practices, policies, or physical features that put disabled children at a substantial disadvantage. For example, refusing to allow movement breaks for a child with ADHD who can't sit still for an hour.

If you believe your child has been discriminated against, you can bring a claim to the SEND Tribunal within 6 months of the incident.

What schools can't do

Some things schools sometimes do are simply not allowed:

• Informal exclusions - sending your child home to "cool down" without formal paperwork is unlawful. Every removal from school must follow the formal exclusion process.
• Reduced timetables without agreement - if the school puts your child on a part-time timetable, this should be a temporary measure agreed with you and the LA, with a clear plan to return to full time.
• Refusing to implement an EHCP - if your child has an EHCP, the school is legally required to deliver the provision in Section F. "We don't have the resources" is not a valid reason.
• Refusing to make reasonable adjustments - the duty applies regardless of cost, unless the adjustment would be genuinely unreasonable.

Getting help

Your local SENDIASS can attend meetings with you, help you draft complaint letters, and explain your options at each stage.

IPSEA provides free legal advice on school duties, disability discrimination, and how to escalate complaints.

Coram Children's Legal Centre offers advice on education law and school complaints.

How our free tool can help

The AI assistant at SEND Parents Help can help you work out whether the school is meeting its legal duties, draft complaint points, and understand when disability discrimination might apply. It covers school support, exclusions, and complaints in detail.

You're not being difficult

Advocating for your child isn't causing trouble. It's doing exactly what any parent would do when their child isn't getting the help they need.

Start with a conversation. Follow up in writing. Escalate if you need to. And know that the law is on your side.

Sources and further reading

Legislation and official guidance

• Children and Families Act 2014, Part 3 (school duties for children with SEN)
• Equality Act 2010 (disability discrimination and reasonable adjustments)
• SEND Code of Practice (schools' duties and the graduated approach)
• School complaints procedure (how to make a formal complaint)